Club ride reports - 17th May

Category 6 ride led by Tony Dos Santos

Saveloy x 2

Ribs x 2 

Cod, as long as they have tartare sauce (two tubs of tartare sauce please), if not steak and kidney pie 

Large chips 

Oh dear, that’s what we had for last Friday's food. Do you all remember that, having fish n’ chips on a Friday or Saturday night as a treat? Just thought I’d put this in there, lol. 

I woke up to find that poor old Kevin had a dicky tummy and wasn’t feeling well. I hope you feel better soon Kev. So, someone had to step up the mantel or is it mantle. Really it’s stepping up to the pedal, I suppose on a bike ride. So, yes I stepped up to the plate and decided to lead. 

I arrived in plenty of time to meet David and Martin for a cuppa at the post office. Kevin was supposed to be there, but, the toilet beckoned him. Did I mention this lol (remember, no emojis). Martin said his feet were still sore after his epic 200 miles London - Paris ride. Amazing Martin, well done. 

We rode to the bus stop after a fuel filled caffeine intake. Daniel was just riding to meet us. We were four. Then Tim Dobson  rode up at 09:13 (24 hour clock as I’m modern you know). Tim advised Angela was coming. We waited and waited and… then around the corner she came. I did advise them that being tardy was not good (roflmao). We rode off at 09:17 (I know this as I checked Daniel’s Strava). Tim wanted to take a short cut to Farking Hill. I obliged and it was a really nice route round the back of Much Hadham. 

We rode up Farking Hill, my heart rate hit like 8,000 bpm and we got to the top with everyone else two miles in a front of me (I kid you not). David, obviously tried to tell me a joke going up “the hill”. Once I arrived everyone was tapping their feet. I then advised “as ride leader I judge the pace” - Roflmao. I did say that, but it was tongue in cheek. 

We rode though Allen’s Green, then Sawbridgeworth, yada, yada, ride, ride. It felt like we were riding into a headwind, but we weren’t; I am just so so unfit. 

We got to the Polo Club at 11:05 (24 hour clock, remember), just in time for the breakfast menu. Martin and Daniel ordered the full English and, my oh my, was it a full English. As the honed athlete, I only had a small sandwich (sausage bap really) and Tim, Angela and David all had a tea cake with jam. The banter was good at the table and Tim told us of some of his epic rides from his younger days. This guy is an animal. Tim once did a hundred mile ride in four hours and ten minutes. That’s like 75mph average isn’t it! Alright, it’s a 24mph average which is still amazing. 

After our stop, it was only a short hop back to Much Hadham. Well, I thought it was going to be a short hop, but I looked at the flags at the bottom of the Polo Club and realised we had a 200mph headwind on the way back. Honest guv, no exaggeration. 

The ride back was nice and I have to thank Martin for drafting me a bit back through Parsonage Lane. Tim and Angela left us just after Parsonage Lane as they wanted to do a few more miles. We said our goodbyes. We rode into Much Hadham and the ride was over. 

Thank you everyone for bearing with me, I’ll get a fitter. 

Can you guess where this was written? Yes on, "The Throne". Roflmao. 

Love and kisses. Tony.